laughingbuzz : Never use word Return – It is a Taboo

Never say Return...
Sometimes a word may sound differently and land you in trouble. Or the other person may get irritated and beat you. Or they may mock you. For example, Rahul AKA Pappu said before previous elections that “Poverty is a state of mind” Poor guy. (Poor in mind, not in money) was misunderstood. What did he say? He said that if you had 100 bn. dollars stashed in Swiss Banks and are penny less in India to prove that you are pure, in fact you will be poor.. Your mind says you are rich but you are really poor, if the money is brought back by Modi. He thought into future and said that. What a misunderstanding of the poor guy, now that NH money is too going?
 
And sometimes, you may land in trouble. One bearded guy boarded a plane. He was accompanied boy his toddler son. It seemed the boy asked his father when the plane would fly. The father said in love, “Hum plane ko udaa Denge”. This was in a foreign land. Unluckily for him, there was a lady who knew Hindi. She thought he was blasting the plane and informed the Captain through the staff. He was arrested, harassed and ultimately they found out the truth that he was only trying to console his toddler son that they would make it fly soon. See the trouble with words. (True incident)
 
Recently I wrote about Pappu learning three English words in one year, as his teacher was unable to teach him more. As the teacher did not want to return the fee as he was still tolerant about the boy though he was reason for all his intolerance, he taught these words for the fee. “Yes, No, Alright.” He asked him to use those words to succeed in life. He got them by heart. One day he was walking on Hyderabad Street where chain snatching happens as frequently as KCR lies. The police man saw this youth near the scene of crime, caught him and asked, “Did you snatch the chain” He said “Yes”. The policeman asked in surprise, “Will you return the chain?” He said “No”. “Ready to go jail?” The guy said “Alright” . Rest is history that our historians have chronicled.
 
Likewise if you go to a cinema hall and a friend asks, “Came to a picture?” it irritates you. You may say, “No! I came to a Dentist”. That guy may get irritated and beat you in a fit of rage. Writer Naina Sehwal, who is niece of Nehru, but has not got award because of the relationship, immediately blames Modi, calls Barkha who films the fight, runs it for seven days 24×7 until other writers with Alzheimer’s, gravely grave, on stretchers, on walking sticks, on ventilators suddenly regain strength and condemn the growing intolerance near Theaters and reading this, film makers who have won awards but have rarely made money may stop biting nails and come for photo op in NDTV. Historians who have chronicled all  scrap and finding no more scrap under Modi, too join the procession to twist facts, scientists who know Marxism more than Science but have won awards may too voice concern and later ask their grandchildren the meaning of intolerance. Why did all this happen? Just because a stray incident happened near the theater. When all these oldies went to the Picture there in were one thousand seven hundred sixty seven violent incidents, three hundred rapes, fifty five item songs where the dancer wore just three inch piece of cloth, They came out and congratulated the film maker, who won an award and pestered him for returning the award in view of growing intolerance near theaters. They later wrote film review that the film was master piece and they never viewed such tolerant movie till then. He too joins the chorus..See! All this happened because one asked a wrong question and the other answered it adamantly. But, it is a national issue now. The two of you belonged to two different communities.
 
Some words are taboo in some situations. Suppose you ask Sunny Kejri, “Did you have breakfast?” when he is fasting at Jantar Mantar, he may be irritated as truth has come out. He will immediately tweet, “People should be allowed to tell lies. This growing intolerance for truth is creating havoc in Society, so return police to us.” This may be picked up by extinct communists and ultra leftists and they may go NDTV studio to return their weapons as token protest and take them back. So be careful with words.
 
The other day I asked one guy, “When did you return?” Tell me what sin I committed..He got wild. He jumped, hopped, danced, crushed his teeth, hit me thrice on my head with some soft object (luckily) and retorted, “Do you think I am a writer to return award that I got by manipulation? Do you think I am a film maker that has poured venom of intolerance in three generations? Do you think I am a scientist with Marxist leaning and have never done research except on intolerance?  Do you think I am a Historian that twisted history and am biting my toe nails now?  Do you think I am an intellectual whose IQ is Zero? What do you think I am? How dare you say I have returned?”
 
From that time I stopped using the abusive word, “RETURN” which had become a taboo and I am using “back” “come back’ ‘go back’ etc.
 
Now it is time to return, sorry, go back to my kitchen work. All are hungry and growing intolerant. Before they too start blaming Modi, I will cook something.

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